The Good and Ugly Kinds of Learning Perfectionism

North Korea

Rest assured that while the media’s causing hysteria over North Korea at the moment, people here in South Korea don’t seem to be worried at all. :)

First of all, sorry for the lack of frequent updates lately.

Working full-time here in Korea has given me lots of fantastic exposure to the language and helped me make good, native speaker friends but it’s also been demanding enough to mean that I’ve had to carefully ration the free time that I get.

My language and fitness targets have been my absolute priority this year, and since the weather’s warmer now I’ve been intentionally spending less time at home and more time out speaking with the Korean locals every chance I get.

I’ve reached the 6 month mark with the Korean language and I’m definitely at a clear intermediate level now which means that spontaneous, fruitful encounters and new friendships have started to become a real regular occurrence, opening up lots of new doors that I previously didn’t have.

My experience with Koreans (particularly in the smaller town that I live in) has shown me that many people here tend to be quite shy about talking to foreigners which I think has a lot to do with them lacking confidence in their own English skills more than anything else. It’s also true that approaching strangers for friendship is rare in Korean culture.

Some East Asian countries can be a tough nut to crack in terms of meeting new people without introduction but it’s definitely doable and very rewarding in the end.

This has been challenging but being the stubborn social risk-taker that I am, it’s a hurdle that I haven’t backed down from. :)

I’m also well aware that it’s been 3 months since I uploaded a progress video so I’ll do that and put some recorded chats with friends on my YouTube channel as well for anyone curious in tracking where I’m at.


The snowball effect

The more you comprehend, the more your chances are of learning passively.

Elementary learners often experience the frustration of being around native speakers having a conversation and only being able to pick out a couple of words here and there.

Most of what they hear is meaningless babble.

You simply cannot learn from incomprehensible noise and this is why passive listening as a beginner is pointless. Even though it’s good to get familiar with the sounds of the language, it’s not an effective use of your time.

But what I’ve noticed time and time again – especially this time with Korean – is that when you reach an intermediate level, you really do begin to notice the details of everything that’s going on around you.

Every time you’re in a conversation or within earshot of one at this level, you continually spot patterns, words and expressions that you previously couldn’t notice.

Although this requires you to have good attention to detail, a lot of it also happens effortlessly and unintentionally.

Comprehensible input, whether through reading or listening, is key to learning quickly and effectively, and as an intermediate learner begins to understand much larger amounts of what’s going on around him or her, the input that was previously useless suddenly gains new value.

Stuff that was totally alien a short while ago becomes meaningful – almost as if it happens overnight.

I think of it as a snowball that’s picking up speed and getting larger the further along it gets.

In the last few weeks, my Korean friends have remarked on what they say is a sharp, rapid improvement in my own level which I put down to the growing momentum of this learning snowball – pushed by driving perfectionism.


The good and ugly kinds of perfectionism

There are two kinds of perfectionists.

On the one hand, you have the know-it-all, (usually) socially inept types who lambast anyone or anything that dares to step outside the box and challenge the norm.

These are the kinds of vocal grammar nazis you find who just can’t stomach someone else’s unconventional ideas or success.

The people who have this kind of attitude study for ages waiting for the non-existent perfection day to arrive when they’ll finally be ready to start communicating. They’re the kind of people who are hesitant to practice openly out of fear of making mistakes and losing face.

It’s a crippling, negative attitude to have.

On the other hand, you have the kind of perfectionism that drives an individual to succeed and to never be satisfied with they’re at.

I alluded to it here while talking about fossilization:

The key here is to let perfectionism drive you to be on a daily mission to improve – even with the most rudimentary things.

I’m constantly keeping my ears open to listen to the way native speakers greet each other, the way they ask simple questions, the slang/colloquial expressions they may use in place of standard expressions, accent variations and so on.

I think to myself, “I know how to say X but I’m sure there’s a better, more natural way to say it” so I seek it out, letting that perfectionist ambition drive me to get it right.

As long as you don’t allow perfectionism to stall your progress through fear of making mistakes then it’s a powerful thing to be driven by.


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19 Things You Shouldn’t Do When Learning A Foreign Language

korean hagwon

Language learning is all about trial and error.

You try one approach. It gives you crappy results. You try something else.

Those of us who have already learned foreign languages tend to find it much easier to learn another one because we’ve learned a lot from our previous mistakes. We know what not to do the next time round.

While everyone takes their own approach to language learning as well as the plethora of “you should do’s” (some of which may benefit some but not others), for today’s post I’ve decided to share 19 “do not do’s” which I believe are hugely important for all language learners.

The most important thing before you do anything of course is to have a real purpose for learning and to be resolutely determined to succeed no matter what.

Whatever distractions get thrown at you, you’re going to see this through to the end.

If you don’t have that level of motivation then stop reading now and find another hobby.

But if you do then read on! :)


1. Don’t miss the importance of being able to paraphrase and describe

We all have a different understanding of what fluency means.

I talked about what I believe to be fluency a while back which can basically be summed up as this:

Being able to describe or ‘paraphrase’ unknown target language content using the target language itself without needing to translate using your own language.

For example, I might not know the word for ‘library’ in Russian say, but if I can describe a building that has many books which I can borrow, a quiet place, a good place to study, etc. using Russian then you could say I’m conversationally fluent.

Specific vocab can be acquired over time as required.

You’ll never ever know every word and every aspect of grammar (even in your own language) but if you can describe and elicit it then you’re already where you need to be.

One of the biggest mistakes people make in my opinion is that they spend too much time trying to learn specific vocabulary and not enough on the core fundamentals (e.g. focusing on terms like ‘library’ which is extremely limited in its use instead of learning how to actually describe the place and its function).


2. Don’t squander your time

Language learning takes time.

A lot of it.

While it’s definitely possible to achieve limited, semi-functional fluency in a few months, you need to understand that learning a language properly takes serious time and to achieve even basic conversational fluency in several months requires daily dedication.

One lesson a week or occasional study periods won’t cut it.

Remember too that there’s only so much we’re capable of learning in the hours we have. Excessive study over many hours at a time will also produce detrimental results.

What this means is that 8 hours in 1 day does not equal 1 hour a day for 8 days.

It’s not the same.

I’m confident that the latter would yield far better results.

You need spaced repetition and you need mental rest which is all part of the learning process.


3. Don’t work against your learning strengths

I told the story a while back of how I failed nearly everything in school and my first year of college.

I was hopeless at anything that involved study.

That was until I discovered that I’m a visual-spatial learner which enabled me to radically change my approach to suit my strengths and weaknesses.

We’re all very different so take some time to assess what works for you and if need be, do as I did and get advice from a professional who can help you identify the things that aren’t working for you.


4. Don’t speak English (or any other language)!

Don’t speak anything other than your target language unless absolutely necessary!

This is such an important point.

I’m currently working as an English teacher in Korea so my job requires me to speak English.

Outside of work and apart from times like this where I have to write a blog post in English or communicate with English speakers (rarely), I use Korean.

I saturate myself in Korean every day.

If you’re not living abroad then you need to allocate as much time as possible every day to do this.

For those of you living in a city where your target language community can be found, make a habit of spending your spare time in that area.

In my home town of Brisbane we had a very small Arabic-speaking community who all lived around one particular area of the city and I used to hang around that spot constantly just to get as much language action as I could.


5. Don’t use outdated, inefficient methods

Grammar-translation methods and tedious memorization of words and rules have been standard practice for centuries all over the world.

They’re outdated and totally ineffective.

I’ve worked in Georgia and Turkey for example where I’ve seen students who have been learning English for years – sometimes decades – and still can’t communicate ‘at all’. They can read and they know English grammar better than most of us do but they can’t respond to the most basic questions.

Whether you’re in a classroom or learning on your own, focusing on conversational, functional language use is crucial.

Learn in context through interaction with other people.


6. Don’t have a macro goal without setting micro goals

What do I mean by macro and micro goals?

A macro goal would be something like, “I want to learn French to pass a C1 test in 2 years”.

It’s a large, long-term goal that you’re ultimately aiming for but you need smaller goals along the way to help you keep moving.

The micro goals are the small outposts that you conquer which give you constant motivation and a way to measure your progress when you look back on what you’ve done.

For example, good micro goals for a fairly new learner would be something like “have 5 conversations every day each week”, “get a haircut”, “make a transaction at the bank”, “instead of using a basic word like ‘go’ which is too easy now, use a more natural-sounding, better alternative like ‘attend’, ‘travel’ or ‘visit'” and so on.

By constantly setting these new goals you’ll never allow yourself to get comfortable.


7. Don’t work hard on one skill and neglect the others

When I’m not learning languages or stuck at work, I’m probably training at the gym.

If I miss a gym day I can’t live with myself!

One of the things I’ve learned to be careful about is making sure not to miss a major muscle group during the week.

This is to avoid ending up like those blokes who have strong upper bodies and then an embarassing set of pencil-thin legs to go with it because they neglect it in their training.

I think of speaking, listening, reading and writing as muscles that need plenty of divided attention.

If conversational fluency is all that matters to you then you might place less emphasis on reading and writing but never underestimate the overall benefit that those skills will have on each other.

Often when I’m speaking I’ll recall words and phrases that I’ve read or written before so it’s all helping achieve the same goal.

Writing is the alternative for practicing output too when speaking is impossible.


8. Don’t use crap material

A lot of people just can’t tell the difference between good and bad material.

Antiquated or overly polite terminology and expressions that nobody in real life actually uses, irrelevant content, confusing or messy grammar explanations, use of a romanized text rather than the original script are common problems.

The issue with bad material is that people spend so much time just trying to make sense of it and find what they’re looking for before they actually get to learning anything.

It’s really important to seek out opinions from experienced learners.

Scan the forums (HTLAL is good for this), blogs and product reviews on sites like Amazon and Book Depository. Ask people who have had success already for advice.

A high price and a pretty cover do NOT necessarily mean high quality.


9. Don’t disregard the culture

As I said before, this is one of the things that separates people who have ordinary success from those with outstanding success.

Language is made up so many intricate expressions of culture and books and courses never adequately cover them.

I’m talking about the way in which the average, ordinary person interacts with other people in his or her community – gestures, intonation, slang, proximity, interjections and cuss words, fillers, etc.

These things take years to pick up even for the best learners but it’s important to realize that they’re part of the whole package.

You need to develop a very good eye for detail and most importantly, a desire and willingness to assimilate into the target language community.


10. Don’t spend too much time studying

Study in short, spaced sessions.


Sitting in front of a book or screen for hours on end going over rules, flashcards and so on isn’t going to make you learn faster.

If anything it’ll hinder you.

Have study periods of 15-30 minutes and spend the rest of your available time putting the language to use.


11. Don’t abuse your physical well-being

Common-sense advice really.

Most people should know that physical well-being directly affects the brain’s performance.

If you sit in front of a computer or TV for hours on end, eat shit food and don’t get enough proper cardio exercise, it’s going to wreck your ability to problem solve and retain information.

Stop poisoning yourself.

The best days I have learning foreign languages come after an awesome sleep and a good, early morning workout.


12. Don’t wait until you’re ready to speak

You’re never going to be “ready”.

People have this idea that if they acquire enough input over time then eventually they’ll be at the point where they can finally start conversing with other people.

While I do believe that input should take some precedence over output (especially in the early stages), to hold off from speaking entirely is to miss out on crucial skill development.

This is not to mention all the interaction and important relationships you’ll deny yourself as well.


13. Don’t focus on grammar study

Heavy grammar study kills conversational progress.

I wrote a contentious post on my position about this here.

You started studying grammar in school after you became a fluent speaker of your native language. Grammar study is for literacy skills at higher levels, not for conversational fluency in the early stages.

I’ve shown this with Arabic and Irish, and I’m about to do the same with Korean.

Focus on dialogues and actively using common language patterns (chunks as some call them) and save the grammar study for later on.


14. Don’t read and listen to stuff that’s way above your level

I made this point in a video I made a short while back.

It’s best to use material that you already understand most of.

Once you’ve moved through the elementary coursebook material and start to use other resources, don’t overwhelm yourself with advanced level content that you understand hardly anything of.

If that means you have to stick to children’s books for a while instead of politics or thick novels, so be it! :)


15. Don’t allow other people to give you unrealistic expectations or feelings of inadequacy

Don’t be discouraged by that guy or girl who speaks amazingly well.

They’ve probably been learning for many years and put in a lot of hard work to get to where they are now. Let it encourage you.

Just focus on what you’re doing.


16. Don’t procrastinate with activities that make you think you’re achieving something when you’re not

It’s very easy to spend an addictive few hours using popular programs like Anki, Memrise or Duolingo.

There comes a point however where these things become just another form of procrastination – and a deceptive one at that.

Think of them as supplements to your learning and limit your time using them. An hour spent just flicking through flashcards is wasteful.

There’s a world full of people out there. :)


17. Don’t let technology make you stupid

I have to say I do agree with some that the more technologically advanced we get, the stupider we become.

It’s so easy to jump on Google and immediately find an answer to something that we used to have to work hard to figure out.

While there are definitely huge benefits to having so much online material at our fingertips, it also means that we’re not training our problem solving skills enough anymore (this applies to many areas including foreign languages).

Do your brain a favor and spend some quality time away from the screen (this includes your phone!).

I force myself to have technology fasts where I shut off the computer and sit down with the old-fashioned pencil and paper, a coursebook and a real dictionary.

Try it sometime.


18. Don’t pay for low-quality teachers

There are some seriously shit teachers out there. Lots of ‘em.

You’re the paying student – you’re in charge!

If they don’t give you a top-quality, communicative lesson and clearly identify your needs, allow you plenty of time to speak, demonstrate patience and so on then find another one.

I’ve had horrible teachers in person and online who just don’t know (or don’t care) how to teach.

The great thing about my favorite language exchange site italki is that you can take trial lessons with teachers to see what they’re like.


19. Don’t rely too much on teachers

And as a follow-on from the previous point, when you do find a good teacher don’t rely on them for your success.

A teacher can’t make you learn.

It’s up to you, the learner, to put in the time and effort to make it happen. Some people blame their lack of progress on the teachers but the truth is a good student will make the most of any lesson – even if it’s bad.

Language teachers are meant to be facilitators and helpers but the rest is up to you. Remember that!


Do you have anything you’d like to add to this list? Share your thoughts below! :)

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This was written by .

Do you use StumbleUpon, Reddit, Pinterest or Digg? A quick upvotelikepin or digg will make my day! Thanks. :)

Comments: If you’ve got something you’d like to add to this or some constructive criticism you can do that at the bottom of this page. Just please be respectful. Any abusive or nonsensical comments will be deleted.

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